🌻 THE CLIVE SAGA — CHAPTER 15

The Case of the Missing Mt. Dew

Scene: The Morning Audit

“Kid, where are you hiding out? Sargento, front and center — now!”

I wander out to where Clive is keeping an eye on things, and if looks could kill, I wouldn’t be typing this.

“So we’re starting the day like that, Kid — a total lack of respect for all I do for your little Hacienda, your shop, and your Sunflower Clan.”

“Clive, if I could figure out what you were yammering about, I might be able to help.”

“First, it’s Don Clive, Kid. Is that so hard to remember?”

“I think you ‘forget’ just to wind me up.”

“That’s possible, Don Clive.”

“Listen, if you’re done making me feel like I’m back in eighth‑grade shop class, I’ll head back to work.”

“We’re not done, Kid, and you’re not going anywhere.”

The Contract Dispute

“You lack the wherewithal to give orders to a personage of my station. It takes a backbone to give orders, Kid — and as you can see, I still have one.”

“Don Clive, what makes you think you’re the senior partner?”

“Age, Kid. And the Postmortal Partnership and Mentoring Contract. Do you ever read your email?”

“I thought that was spam.”

“Well, pull it out of your spam folder. It’s all laid out in black and white.”

“Just give me the highlights.”

“The Postmortal in the partnership will forever be the senior partner due to the intangible assets he brings and the invaluable mentorship he provides.”

“So you’re 51 percent to my 49?”

“Think again, Kid. Eighty‑twenty.”

“I didn’t sign any such contract.”

“You failed to terminate our relationship during the trial period — the one that expired before I arrived.”

“That one?”

“That one.”

The Beverage Crisis

“What’s really bothering you, Don Clive?”

“Take a look at this cup.”

“I filled it so you wouldn’t get dehydrated.”

“Doing your duty finally, Kid, but what concoction under the heavens is in it — and where’s my Mt. Dew?”

“I thought you should take a break from guzzling a gallon a day and wean off the caffeine.”

“So this is your idea of making me nicer?”

“Tough love, Don Clive.”

“You didn’t tell me what it was.”

“7‑Up — a tasty bit of lemon‑lime soda.”

“Says you, Kid. Get me some Mt. Dew.”

“There’s a problem. Yesterday was so hot we went through all four two‑liters I had for the weekend. I only drank half a liter. Guess who slurped the rest?”

“You’re letting me down in the shop, Kid. As the junior partner, the one thing you have to do for me is make sure I have Mt. Dew and snacks.”

“Just drink the 7‑Up, Don Clive — it was one of my favorites as a kid.”

“This ain’t about you, Kid. Make sure I have Mt. Dew in the morning, or things might get ugly.”

“As opposed to this little conversation?”

“Junior Partner — just do your job.”

Closing Note

Clive sat back, poncho rustling, skeletal fingers wrapped around his cup of lemon‑lime disappointment. The shop was quiet except for the faint hum of the vent and the sound of me wondering how I’d lost control of both caffeine supply and corporate hierarchy to a skeleton.